Let's make the most of it all

I'm recently married, young (25), intelligent, easy going, organized, professional when I need to be, laid back when I need to be, relatively healthy, resourceful, organized, creative, and I seem to have all the time in the world to follow my dreams.

That is not to say that I think I will live forever, or that I feel as though I can take my time in accomplishing my dreams. No. Certainly not. It is only to say due to some health issues over the past year and a half I have had a lot of time with no job, no school, little financial responsibilities and large amounts of time at home.

It first started when I became ill and was unable to keep a job and keep my health. As I was spending most of my savings on getting by and spending a lot of my down time with my then-boyfriend, we eventually moved in together. Then one thing led to another and as my finances dwindled, my then-fiance seemed to take over and handle most of our financial situations. It was hard for me to adjust to at first, as I am sure it was hard for him at times. I had always been great with my money, as was evident by the condo I owned, and the amount of time I was able to financially support myself with no job. However, when the money ran very short, he stepped in and took care of me. He supported me through it, and still is to this day. I am still shocked that considering our situation we were able to pull off a beautiful wedding (as I said, I can be resourceful and creative).

And now that my health has improved I am getting back to the work force! Although my new job is on a casual/on-call basis, which means that I can have anywhere from no shifts on a paycheck or I can have full-time work. This sort of work situation is not good for any sort of stable financial planning, however it is good for my health, which still can be sporadic at times. Also, since we are in a place financially where my husband's income is enough to get by on, and still pay a little debt each month, I don't need to feel pressure to rush back to work full-time, possibly aggravating my body and making myself ill again (as has happened before).

And possibly the best benefit of it all, and one that I am encouraging myself to take advantage of, is the fact that in my free time I can focus on my creative dreams. I can paint, and create, and write! I know how easy it is to say that I am going to work towards my dreams and then to not do it, however I have a plan. I did say I was organized, didn't I?!

Schedules make my life work, writing things down and keeping things organized is the key to my success. It has worked for me before, and it will work for my now, and it will work for me in the future. So, I have made schedules for myself. I am also making deadlines for myself. I know I cannot expect it all from myself right in the beginning, but they are goals. Over time I will expect more and more for myself and my schedules will only become fuller with my own dreams and aspirations. I am going to succeed at my goals, I can. I have the ideas, I have the talent, and I have the know-how, now I just have to make it happen!

Watch out world!

Books, books, books...

I have been receiving pressure from my lovely fiance to read more instead of sitting at home and not accomplishing much. It's pressure that I appreciate though. Really, what harm could come from reading more?

A lot of my reading over the past few months has been wedding related and Jeff has been encouraging me to branch out and read other things. I have also been on a crafting book kick lately. Trying to find projects to entertain my mind, and inspire some creativity.

Since the time we have been together (almost a year and a half) I think I have only read one fiction book in it's entirety. (One which I later recommended to Jeff to read and he loved). However, Jeff thinks I would get some enjoyment reading more fiction, which I completely agree with. So, to get myself motivated to find books that interest me and spark my imagination (possibly encouraging me to write as well!) I was considering re-reading books I once loved, but I still was not sure where to start. Then one day to my surprise there was a 'Chapters' shopping bag sitting on the sofa with a book comprising the entire 'Weetzie Bat' series (minus the newest one). The series is one which I read as a teenager and loved at that stage in my life. It is a series which most certainly will keep me entertained and will spark some creativity. So, over the next while I will be getting back to reading, thanks to the generosity of my fiance, and hopefully getting back to writing again as well!

Just over one month to go....

It's almost my wedding day, and I cannot believe it is almost here. There are still a lot of last minute details to be worked out, but everything is going swimmingly.

Looking back, I always though I would get married when I was about 25. But I don't remember thinking much about the specifics of my wedding. I know that most girls dream of what their wedding day will be like, what kind of dress they will wear, what the cake will look like, what their first dance will be to, things like that. I never thought of those things, and I am glad that I didn't. This way I have been free to do what I want, and what my fiance wants, and we have not had to rely on living up to a "dream" we once had. We only need to live up to the desires we have now, and what works for both of our styles, and our budget.

Our wedding is slightly low-key. Which is sorta the way I am I suppose. It is going to be glamorous and unique, not over the top, not typical, but still classic and romantic. Just the way I want it.

Besides the wedding planning. there really isn't much going on in my life. And that is not because I am obsessive when it comes to my wedding. It's just the way life is working out these days. I'm not working still (which is getting slightly annoying), so there is nothing work related in my life...although I am constantly looking and applying for jobs. There is also little time spent with family or friends lately....I've begun to grow distant I suppose to some of the people who were once close with me. It's again, not been intentional, but I suppose I should get back on the friendship band wagon. I am sure it would be good for my emotional and mental health.

I've been feeling the need for a project, and have not really been feeling the motivation towards anything. I am sure that something will come to me sooner or later. Maybe I will need to force myself to just do something, some sort of project to get me going. I've been considering volunteering, just so I can myself out of the house and back into the real world. It's probably a good idea, and I should look into something that interests me a little more.

So, that's life right now. Really rather dull, and in the need of some spice.

On the up

Job hunting has not been going well for me as of lately. I've been applying and applying, even going to a few interviews and then....either I get a call saying they offered the position to someone with more experience or I just get no call at all.

I know that some of the reason that I have not yet got a position is because I am slightly picky in the type of positions I am hoping to get. Still, if I were to receive a position, I am slightly worried that I might not be able to physically handle it. My health is doing better; however, because I have not been working in so long my body does not have the same amount of energy as it use to.

Still, I am keeping on. And looking into other options.

I need to get out there, into the world. I need to socialize with people again.

I am going to try spending time with more of my friends again. I need those relationships, and I am sure they could always use my friendship as well. I also am considering volunteering. I need something to keep me busy.

As a sort of task, I have been purchasing craft books and am attempting to get back in touch with more of my artistic ideas. Last night I made some really neat envelopes and am considering putting them up on Etsy to see if they sell. They were easy to make, they kept me busy and hey, if they can bring me in a little money, then that is just great too.

So, that is what I will be doing in the meantime until I get a job.

I don't want to complain. I don't like to complain. However, I feel pretty blah right now...so if my writing seems odd, blame it on my pounding headache.

Today is the day I get to see the 'Sex and the City' movie! I am excited beyond words. I watched the trailer a few times over this morning which got me more and more excited about the whole thing. I want to get all glammed up for the movie and cannot figure out what to wear. This is a real event to me. I know that may seem pathetic to some, the fact that I feel a strong desire to get dressed up for a movie, but honestly, I don't care much.

Now, again, I am not trying to complain, but I kinda wish I was going to the movie with some girl friends. I wish I had a bunch of girl friends that were as close to me as Carrie, Charlotte, Samantha and Miranda are to each other. However, I have never really had good girl friends. I've been friends with girls, and don't get me wrong I did enjoy it...But I never felt I had a group I could depend on. I am sure that much of it was due to my lack of trust, and my inability to get excited about every little "girly" thing (ironically I often am the 'girly' one of the group)....Hmm...Come to think of it there have been times when I was close with one girl at a time. But since a little after high school there have not really been any close girlfriends like that in my life. It is something I desire though. Something that I want to work on. Girls need their girl friends, and I am sure that I would feel a more balanced person if I had those sorts of relationships.

So, here's my question to all of you out there. Either it is just something you can think about, or something you can leave a comment about. I, personally, am rather reserved and slightly shy when it comes to meeting new people, not because I don't like people, but because I don't think people will find me interesting most of the time. I am not working right now (in between jobs) and I am not going to school, so how, in a situation like mine, do you meet people and make new friends? (Oh, and I don't like the bar!) Then, once you have made friends with someone, how do you create a stronger and closer relationship with them??

Something for me to think about I suppose.

Bathroom re-do

J(my fiance) and I having been stressing off and on due to the leak in our bathroom ceiling. Our neighbor above was not very helpful when we brought it to her attention in mid-January. So, we have been dealing with our condo board who have been trying to figure it out, and have had three separate plumbers in as they assumed it was a plumbing issue (which would be the condo associations responsibility). They cut two holes in our ceiling awhile back, but still nothing was resolved.

Finally last night they got somewhere! Two of the guys on the condo board went upstairs and cut a whole in the ladies wall where the plumbing was. They ran the water and ran the water, but saw no dripping. Meanwhile water is pouring into our place! We collected almost a whole ice cream pale worth of water, and that was only the stuff we were catching. Anyways, I guess they also found some mold in the wall, and it seems that the water was soaking in between some cracked tiles, back behind the grout, and then making its way onto our ceiling.

So after all this, they contacted the lady who owns the place (she is renting it out right now to some nice girl). I don't know if she thought they were lying or what, but she was there tonight with some construction guy and she was saying that she still thinks it is a plumbing problem. J who was with the condo guys last night when they were trying to figure it out told her what they thought it was. J showed them the loose tiles and the construction guy tore some off. I could not believe the amount of mold there. It was bad. She still seemed to deny it was a problem with her place, but we didn't feel like arguing with her. Eventually one of the condo guys showed up to take a look and show her what they noticed (exactly what J showed her). After condo guy talked to her he came down and talked to us. He said that she is responsible for repair to her place, and that apparently one of the other condo guys had said to her (in her words) that the condo association would pay for repairs to our place so as not to cause conflict between owners.

So, we are hoping this is actually what will happen. We much rather deal with the condo board fixing our place then the lady. She has refused to pay already, and has no respect for us (maybe because she thinks we are young). Anyways, if I ever have to deal with her again, it will be too soon. I hope she gets this thing done ASAP so we can get our place fixed up too. It's getting close to the wedding now and I don't want to be dealing with construction in our house while I am close to the wedding date.

On a more positive note, I am going to see 'Sex and the City' on thursday night. They have a "sneak peak" at the theater and I have tickets! Yeah!!!

Some food for thought.

Right now I am making dinner with my most lovely of fiances. Neither of us are really all that hungry, yet we are still making dinner. It's a nice relaxing thing that we both enjoy, cooking. There is something about it that is peaceful, and easy, yet it possesses it's own set of challenges (especially in a small kitchen).

Much of our relationship's positive aspects revolves around food come to think of it. We both love trying new foods, and we get stuck on certain things when we find something we both love....like Indian butter chicken. Many of our favorite foods are ethnic foods, many of which are things that our families have never tried.

When doing a gift registry most of the items we registered for where cooking or baking items. We have most of what we need already as we have both been living on our own for some time now, but registering for the higher end and specialty items was something that appealed to both of us.

So, food is a big part of my life, and that's the way I like it!